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[Kevin Coed]

Got another one - a few years ago there was a bit of a speed drought and I was desperate. A mate had loads of 'herbal speed' cos he'd worked for a company that had sold them, so he gave me handfuls of them. I took a couple and didn't feel anything at all so decided that if anything was going to work then I'd have to neck about 30 of them. Later that night a group of us were queuing to get into a night-club when my belly felt a bit iffy and I let one go. Oops. I'd followed through.

Gingerly dancing on the spot until I could get inside and I then rushed into a toilet cubicle.

The toilets were comparable to the toilet in Trainspotting. The floor was flooded with water and I happened to be wearing my best suit. There was no way that I could get my trousers off to remove my soiled pants without removing my boots and there was nowhere to put my feet without getting them wet. There was only one option. Lowering my trousers I tugged at my underwear but to no avail. There was only one thing for it. I pulled them up as high as I could and clenching them in teeth proceeded to bite them off.

Job completed I lifted the cistern and dropped the offending article inside.

The moral of this story is 'Just so no to fake drugs'.

[zombiefan3999]

Thats truelly shameless.

[tigerheart76]

How shameless am I?

Not enough to stand a cat in hell's chance of winning, by comparison with the tales here, 

[Paul]

How shameless am I?

Not enough to stand a cat in hell's chance of winning, by comparison with the tales here, 

Have a go, anyway! 

So what's the most shameless thing you've done, Tigerheart?

[tigerheart76]

Have a go, anyway! 

So what's the most shameless thing you've done, Tigerheart?

Just been trying to think of one that was reasonably safe for work...

In my last year at university, I got invited to a formal dinner by a friend at another college, and went, despite having a stinking cold and feeling like death warmed over. Drink flowed at said dinner, (red wine, white wine, other stuff that I can't remember, but I drank it!) and then me and the friend went and had a few in my college's bar - he kept buying me double measures of Bailey's (i.e four measures per glass) and I kept drinking them. A bad idea, on top of all the other booze and the medicine I was taking for the cold!

A worse idea however was my deciding to phone home after my friend had gone back to his college!! I was on the student executive in college, and had access to a phone that could be used for personal calls as well as college stuff, and to cut a long story short, I had to go throw up while I was on the phone to my folks, and they were able to tell pretty clearly what was happening from the other end of the call.  Moreover, I didn't quite make it to my room the first time and...well, left evidence of the consequences of mixing alcohol and cold medicine (to the extent that the 'cabin' the phone was in reeked of barf for days afterward and the carpet underneath it had to be replaced!)

That experience put me off Bailey's for life, unsurprisingly...

A less horrendous experience was the multiple Aftershocks I downed at a workmate's leaving do - wasn't ill, but was still drunk at 8 the next morning 

[Paul]

Quality... and they had to replace the carpet! I like it...

[tigerheart76]

Quality... and they had to replace the carpet! I like it...

 

My folks still won't let me live that one down...

[Paul]

Quality... and they had to replace the carpet! I like it...

 

My folks still won't let me live that one down...

My mum and dad haven't let me live the story down that I touched upon above - the one in which I stukc my head up the nurse's skirt, as they were there and witnessed it first hand! 

[tigerheart76]

My mum and dad haven't let me live the story down that I touched upon above - the one in which I stukc my head up the nurse's skirt, as they were there and witnessed it first hand! 

I can see why...     

Up to that point at uni I'd managed to keep my drinking habits to myself...it was mortifying!

[Inspector Tanzi]

My mum and dad haven't let me live the story down that I touched upon above - the one in which I stukc my head up the nurse's skirt, as they were there and witnessed it first hand! 

I remember when i was laughing about it and your sad looked at me with a serious expression on his face and said "It was the most embarrasing day of my life"

[Kevin Coed]

Have I won?

[Jonny]

We've not received the results back yet. 

[Stephen Grimes]

Have I won?

Zombiefan?

[Almar@Shameless]

Wow! What can I say? With my other work hat on where I organise
competitions for DVDs on behalf of other clients I can honestly say
I've never been involved in something so depraved. You're all truly
revolting people and it touches my heart and brings a tear to my eye
that you should be interested in Shameless DVDs - we hoped but never
expected to find you lost dirty lambs out there in the retail
wilderness.

Right enough of that shite. I have to say that out of all the entries
(which do appear to become increasingly familiar - these shagging ones
remind me of Razzle stories) my absolute favourite was Stephen Grimes
ending up on the 6 O'Clock News for posting up those dirty call cards.
I's always wondered who had that job. You have to be well and truly
Shameless to do that (as you do working on Shameless films!) So
Stephen the DVDs is yours.

However as I've never seen so much effort put into an online comp
before I'm going to provide another couple of New York Ripper DVDs
this once as it'll help start off a couple more collections out there
and hopefully stop any losers from wanking into my milk etc! 

So also winning a copy of New York Ripper is Richard C for doing what
I should have done to a couple of flatmates in the past and Kevin Coed
as I'm interested in seeing if his fascination with putting things in
his arse extends to putting a Shameless DVD (case - not just the disc)
up his rectum.

And now I'm off to shower!

Almar 

[Stephen Grimes]

Almar thank you so much and thanks to Jonny and Paul for the competition,never thought my dodgy past would win me a cool dvd 
Btw i'll get that video out when i see you guys in London so you can have a laugh